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Does anyone have a pre-nup


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#1 Guest_Bubbly_Bride007_Guest

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 06:29 AM

Just curious... all anon please as it is a touchy subject, unless you have a comment etc smile.gif

#2 Busterella

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 07:33 AM

I was actually thinking of this only the other day and wondered about posting the topic. I would have only I forgot.

Hubby's mother joked to me even before we were engaged that I would have to sign a pre nup and I looked quite shocked. She loved my reaction. I was thinking was there something that they were hiding from me..... anyway, it was a joke thank god, because I don't think I would have signed. But having said that, I was not put in the situation so I don't know. I love my hubby to bits and would want to spend the rest of my life with him but if I was to sign a pre nup, I would probably prefer just to live in sin and not get married.

Hubby has property with his brother and sister and I have some shares but we didn't have a pre nup. What is his is ours and what is mine is mine!!! laugh.gif Just joking. We share everything, even our salaries went into a joint account way before we had bought a property together.

Does that make sense?
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#3 Renee`

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 09:42 AM

Klay and I would never of even thought about it, everything we have we own together, we built everything up from nothing - so we would always just go 50/50 - there are certain things he would take and i would take, like he would take his stero and CDs and I would take both the dogs, little things like that we have discussed..i would not off married klay if he insisted on a pre nup to ME it says he doesnt trust me...
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#4 Puggie

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 09:43 AM

My HTBs accountants raised this as an issue if we were going to live together (unmarried) more than a specified period of time as otherwise I might be entitled to half of everything he had (can't remember what the time period was, though).

While I was grossly offended by this, and HTB was too, I can see their point - HTB had SUBSTANTIALLY more than I had, so a lot more to lose had I been a 'gold digger'. I can't prove it, but I have reason to suspect they ran a background check on me and my credit rating too!! blink.gif

They sent us some information on a pre-wedding nup (an agreement which protected HTBs assets up until the time we married) but HTB obviously told them it was not an issue, because it never went any further.

Anyway - now we're getting married we've come to a decision about this - what's mine is mine and what's his is mine too (KIDDING). Seriously - we would never sign a pre-nup in a married situation, because we believe this is a partnership so we share everything.

Had HTB asked me to, I would have signed an agreement, before we were engaged/married, agreeing that I would not go after his pre-existing assets if we broke up before getting married.

#5 Shellbee

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 09:52 AM

nah, we had nothing and now we have a little bit - but it's ours.

#6 asrai

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 10:02 AM

If I had been asked to sign a pre-nup, I would have. Unfortunately bad timing in selling property and then the dot com crash sorted it all out anyhow so there was really no need. My husband says he never would have asked me to sign one, but I don't see the problem with it.

#7 mishkathecat

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 01:03 PM

call me an idiot.... and i'm sure someone will...

but my understanding is that pre-nups aren't legally binding in australia anyway? so really you've just entered into a contract in which contract law would prevail but a pre-nup as we all understand it really has no legal grounding?

like i said.... call me an idiot if i'm wrong...

#8 Harmonie

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 02:07 PM

When I met my H2B I owned a unit...

When he moved in I knew at that time if he lived with me (Now it is like 6 months defacto - not the old 2 year rule) he could take half! But I think if i trusted him enough to move in with me and share my life I trusted him i guess not to rip me off?? Since then we joined our bank accounts after 10 months and purchased a house together at the same time!

Now lucky him... His name is now on my units loan but not the title!!! Hehehe

But I would never consider him to do anything bad - But on the other note should anything happen to me (knock on wood) I would want him to have the lot in a heart beat.
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#9 karry327

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 02:43 PM

When hubby and I first got together I had a house and owned all it's contents - he came into our relationship with a bed and some bed side drawers!!

We wrote up a small agreement and got 2 witnesses to sign and filed it away. Most likely would never have held up if it needed to but it was something. I never thought we'd need it but I'm level headed enough to know that relationships can turn in all kinds of directions. I was young and had come too far just to give it away if our relationship didn't work out and things turned horrible.

Since then, he bought into my Father's share of the house (has now been sold) and we have bought 2 investment units together. Now everything is 'ours'!

I don't see pre-nups as a bad thing, just sensible. If people have an honest and loving relationship, what's the issue? They're just protecting the person who has considerably more to lose should the other person bugger off and become greedy IMO.

#10 ***JJ***

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 03:19 PM

QUOTE (karry327 @ Jun 9 2006, 02:43 PM)
I don't see pre-nups as a bad thing, just sensible. If people have an honest and loving relationship, what's the issue? They're just protecting the person who has considerably more to lose should the other person bugger off and become greedy IMO.

I agree.

My husband and I have been trying to get organised to draw up a financial agreement between us. Essentially he has an amount of inherited wealth, which is invested in shares and property, and I am in the process of building a house that I intend to use as an investment property.

Of course we love each other to death. Of course we plan on being together for ever. However, as Karry put so well, relationships can turn in all sorts of directions for all sorts of reasons. An agreement between us is really just documenting what we brought in to the relationship should anything ever happen.

I do, however, think this is largely due to us coming in to the marriage from very different financial positions.

One other point I would like to add is that while we lived together for several years before marrying, we are only now gradually combining finances. We're just that kind of couple, I guess smile.gif

I think the important thing is that we're committed to each other and the family we'll build together. Our individual financial positions will ultimately be to the benefit of our family.




#11 angee5456

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 03:30 PM

QUOTE (mishkathecat @ Jun 9 2006, 01:03 PM)
call me an idiot.... and i'm sure someone will...

but my understanding is that pre-nups aren't legally binding in australia anyway? so really you've just entered into a contract in which contract law would prevail but a pre-nup as we all understand it really has no legal grounding?

like i said.... call me an idiot if i'm wrong...

This is exactly what I was thinking! I thought I learnt in contract law a few years ago (I could in all probablilty be wrong as it has been a while) that contracts made between family are generally considered not legally binding under Australian contact law.
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#12 lazuli

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 04:14 PM

I don't believe they are legally binding in the strictest sense - but should things turn sour, they certainly provide a good record to the courts of the situation at the time of entering into the relationship (ie who owned what), and what the intentions were.

it's rare that a court would automatically allocate 50/50 in a dispute between partners, so a pre-nup would have sway in the judge allocating what proportion, or which assets, were to stay with whom.
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#13 Guest_Bubbly_Bride007_Guest

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 07:52 PM

The reason I ask is that H2B has started his own company which I am one of the directors of and it is taking off in a huge way. I suggested that we get some sort of paperwork together to ensure if things went sour, that we were both protected. We have looked into it a little and that would involve setting up a family trust and buying any assets or any money that is accumulated would go into the family trust. It is kind of like making your finances their own company or enitity.

I know it all sounds very unromantic and h2b was not too fussed on the conversation, however I watched my parents go through a divorce and watched my dad get taken for everything and I don't want that to happen if we part ways. I want us both to be protected and our future children.

I believe as does h2b that marriage is for life, but so did many people before they got divorced. I think it is a good thing to protect your personal interests, especially when there is a lot of money involved!!!

I saw Donald Trump speak at a conference a few weeks ago and he said one of the keys to success is to always have a pre-nup!!! lol biggrin.gif

#14 Tleblrig

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 10:31 PM

QUOTE (mishkathecat @ Jun 9 2006, 01:03 PM)
call me an idiot.... and i'm sure someone will...

but my understanding is that pre-nups aren't legally binding in australia anyway? so really you've just entered into a contract in which contract law would prevail but a pre-nup as we all understand it really has no legal grounding?

like i said.... call me an idiot if i'm wrong...

You’re not an idiot! ‘Pre-nups’ were indeed not formally recognised in Australia for quite some time, up until 2000 I think.

However, so long as they were properly executed, (both partners sought independent legal advice etc.) now they certainly ARE binding. They are actually referred to as ‘binding financial agreements’ in Australia and take precedence over the relevant sections of the Family Law Act dealing with property division and spousal maintenance.

You can make a binding financial agreement before, during or even at the end of your marriage (but before divorce) if you want, so if you start out with very little money and don’t see the need for one, you can always make one a bit later if you feel the need (ie. one of you gets a big inheritance).

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#15 Candy

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Posted 09 June 2006 - 10:55 PM

If someone was extremely wealthy - perhaps I could understand it. But personally I don't understand why people don't combine their finances or do that sort of thing.

On a sidenote..

Since day one Alan and I have shared everything. We are that kind of couple. smile.gif
I can't imagine it any other way and I can't imagine being with someone who was so 'this is mine, that is yours' sort of thing. Alan and I share our wealth and our debt no matter who earns what. It is all OURS wub.gif

I have heard of people who want to sign contracts when they have purchased houses together to say they invested this much money and in the event it doesn't work out, they would take out the same amount plus half the value er whatever. ohmy.gif Its very shocking to hear this in my eyes. While some people see this as being sensible and realistic, I would also hope that I would make the right judgement about a persons character to know in the event that things went sour, we would both still do the right thing.

I know the whole if you live together after 3-6 months you can take half of what someone has. While that may be true, I would imagine it wouldn't be so straight forward and if you did have investment properties on the side you would have to proove that someone has contributed some sort of funds to it - even if it were 100 bucks uno.


Interesting thread smile.gif






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