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#1 LoveSweetpea

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Posted 18 July 2011 - 03:05 PM

Hi ladies, hoping someone can offer me some helpful advice.

J is almost 2 (next month) and for the last month or so his day time sleep has been absolute crap. Well, actually it's not the sleep itself that's crap it's the journey getting to that sleep. For the last, I don't know, at least 8 months he's had 1 day sleep during the day and goes to bed between 12:30 and 1 and has about 2 hours sleep. The last month or so I put him to bed and then 2 HOURS LATER he's still in his cot awake. Usually he's not crying or anything, just in there yabbering away to himself.

I end up going in there if he's been in there for 2 hours or so and rock him to sleep - I have NEVER done this before and I really detest doing it (not only for the bad habits, but I just simply don't want to do it!).

As much as I don't want to do it, when I do he's generally asleep within 5-10 minutes and then will sleep for 2 hours as normal. I do it because he really does need that sleep (when I end up going in there, he has dark circles under his eyes, goes to sleep and then sleeps for that solid 2 hours - I figure if he didn't need it, he wouldn't sleep for long).

It basically means that our afternoons are a write off as J's in bed from 1pm to 5pm which I hate, I like to take him for a ride on his bike or to the park or something in the afternoons, but 5pm is getting a bit late for that.

I thought that things had gone back to normal as for the last 5 days straight he's gone into his cot and gone to sleep by himself and everything's great - awake by 3 or 3:30 gives us plenty of time to enjoy the afternoon together.

Any suggestions on what I should do? Should i just leave him in there and forget the sleep (i.e leave him there and if he's still awake at say 4pm get him back up and figure that's his "rest" time)? Really don't want to do this though, I am certain that he does actually need it as I said before - dark circles, and then sleeps for a good 2 hours. I'm just worried that if I try just letting him stay in his cot and not go to sleep, by 4:30 or 5 he is going to be extremely overtired and it's going to be disgusting until he goes to bed. At the moment he goes to bed between 7:30 and 8 and sleeps for 12 hours overnight (he ALWAYS goes to sleep at night by himself, and always has done and rarely wakes overnight).

Or maybe if I did try the above, put him to bed at 6:30 or 7 as he'll be so overtired by then. I really don't like this scenario at all as I imagine he'll be extremely overtired (if he's got major dark circles under his eyes at 3pm I hate to imagine what they'd look like by 7pm wacko.gif )

Anyway I'm talking in circles and repeating myself all over the shop, so if anyone has anything to suggest I'm all ears laugh.gif

TIA smile.gif
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#2 Monica

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Posted 18 July 2011 - 04:09 PM

I know it's probably against everything I've ever read but the minute I gave Nina a book or toy to take to bed, the tears and talking stopped and she went straight off after a few minutes.

Perhaps try putting him down at 1.30ish instead?
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#3 claire_p

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Posted 18 July 2011 - 04:27 PM

Maybe he just isnt tired at 1pm anymore. Liam was 2 back in March and since then his daysleep has become a bit later. He goes to bed more like 2pm/3pm these days and I make sure he is up by 5pm and he goes to bed at 8pm. He was in his cot until last tuesday and although would throw a little wobbly on his way once in the cot he would want his mobile turned on and his blanky put over him and he would fall asleep on his own within a few minutes. Now, being in his big bed, he just hops out, so the last week I have been laying with him patting him on his back (he has just started sleeping on his tummy) and he goes to sleep. Although, this is now becoming a bit of a habit at night too rolleyes.gif Have you tried rocking him when he first goes to bed at 12.30pm? Instead of rocking would he fall asleep with some patting when you put him in.
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#4 Calzo

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Posted 18 July 2011 - 05:09 PM

Not that this is much help but my older two flat out refused to sleep during the day from the time they were 12 months. rolleyes.gif
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#5 Oldie

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Posted 18 July 2011 - 07:20 PM

Can you do all the things you would normally do in the afternoon in the morning? That way Jackson can go to sleep when you get home, and he may be more tired by having been so busy.
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#6 LoveSweetpea

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Posted 18 July 2011 - 08:04 PM

QUOTE(Monica @ Jul 18 2011, 04:09 PM) View Post

I know it's probably against everything I've ever read but the minute I gave Nina a book or toy to take to bed, the tears and talking stopped and she went straight off after a few minutes.

Perhaps try putting him down at 1.30ish instead?


He does have his Ducky and IgglePiggle in bed with him...don't really want to put more "people" in there! He does talk to them and play with them - sometimes if I open the door quietly and peep in, he's dancing them around the cot rolleyes.gif


QUOTE(claire_p @ Jul 18 2011, 04:27 PM) View Post

Maybe he just isnt tired at 1pm anymore. Liam was 2 back in March and since then his daysleep has become a bit later. He goes to bed more like 2pm/3pm these days and I make sure he is up by 5pm and he goes to bed at 8pm. He was in his cot until last tuesday and although would throw a little wobbly on his way once in the cot he would want his mobile turned on and his blanky put over him and he would fall asleep on his own within a few minutes. Now, being in his big bed, he just hops out, so the last week I have been laying with him patting him on his back (he has just started sleeping on his tummy) and he goes to sleep. Although, this is now becoming a bit of a habit at night too rolleyes.gif Have you tried rocking him when he first goes to bed at 12.30pm? Instead of rocking would he fall asleep with some patting when you put him in.


hmmmm maybe I should try putting him down at 1:30-2 and see how that goes. Push everything back an hour (lunch etc) and hope for the best!

That's my other dilemma, being pregnant I want to put him into his big boy bed before bub comes in February, but the thought of that at the moment scares me to death!! I think he'll have way too much "fun" in there then, being able to get out of bed and play with his toys!


QUOTE(Calzo @ Jul 18 2011, 05:09 PM) View Post

Not that this is much help but my older two flat out refused to sleep during the day from the time they were 12 months. rolleyes.gif


Gah!! That's terrible!!! I don't want him to lose that day sleep until he's at least 4 tongue.gif


QUOTE(Oldie @ Jul 18 2011, 07:20 PM) View Post

Can you do all the things you would normally do in the afternoon in the morning? That way Jackson can go to sleep when you get home, and he may be more tired by having been so busy.


We go out usually 4 or 5 mornings every week. We have things on 3 days a week - swimming lesson, gymbaroo and playgroup - and we are usually at the shops or something 1 or 2 days a week ph34r.gif Swimming used to tire him out big time, gymbaroo is full on because it's at a play centre and we play for a good hour afterwards as well and playgroup is 2 hours full on. At the shops too he usually walks/runs most of the time too. So I figure he's got to be getting tired out, even when we're at home I try to do activities and stuff with him.

I'll try tomorrow pushing his routine back an hour and see how that goes (so lunch more at 12:30 or so and bed at 2). Fingers crossed!!
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#7 em2007

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Posted 18 July 2011 - 08:20 PM

Yeah, try putting him down a little later and see if that helps. Angus does the same so I completely understand - he can appear tired and ready for sleep, then the minute I put him down he starts jumping around the cot like he is on speed. Eventually he crashes and sleeps for hours but then it is late in the day and he is awake till 9.30 at night.

Putting him down slightly later does help though.

I do remember Will doing similar though and we just kept persisting with it and he is still having rests/naps at 3.5 - still sleeps at childcare the days he is there even.

#8 LoveSweetpea

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Posted 18 July 2011 - 08:46 PM

QUOTE(~Melissa~ @ Jul 18 2011, 08:20 PM) View Post

Yeah, try putting him down a little later and see if that helps. Angus does the same so I completely understand - he can appear tired and ready for sleep, then the minute I put him down he starts jumping around the cot like he is on speed. Eventually he crashes and sleeps for hours but then it is late in the day and he is awake till 9.30 at night.

Putting him down slightly later does help though.

I do remember Will doing similar though and we just kept persisting with it and he is still having rests/naps at 3.5 - still sleeps at childcare the days he is there even.


Oh god, I really don't want him up till 9:30 - I enjoy that time in the evening soooo much laugh.gif tongue.gif

Fingers crossed, I guess I can only try tomorrow...!
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#9 claire_p

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Posted 20 July 2011 - 09:10 PM

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#10 LoveSweetpea

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Posted 22 July 2011 - 01:29 PM

Well I posted this on Monday.

Tuesday - epic FAIL! DH and I took him to Lollipops play centre for a play and lunch which he loved! Got home just before 2 and put him to bed then. Think putting him to bed later is not going to work, I think he was well overtired and he didn't sleep at all wacko.gif Left him in there whinging for ages then tried to rock him but no cigar. He was just too unsettled and ended up working himself up to near hysteria. Even took him for a drive in the car in the end as if he's tired he'll generally fall asleep within 5 or 10 minutes. Nope. Drove for an hour and he was still in the back crying. Got home about 5:45pm and just put him into our bed with Toy Story movie on and he stayed there till dinner time, then I put him to bed earlier. Poor kid, he just stared at that tv like an absolute zombie, eyes hanging out of his head.

Wednesday we had swimming lesson in the morning. Put him to bed around 1 as normal - went to sleep just fine (but probably still very tired from the day before).

Yesterday - had to rock him.

today - yet to be seen. He's in bed but still chatting away in there.

I think I just have to accept that I'm going to have to do this if I want him to sleep. Detest it with a passion though! But I don't know what else to do!! Especially after Tuesday, letting him not have a sleep is not an option - he definitely needs it or will end up a screaming, whinging monster.


ETA - was sound asleep 40 minutes after going into his cot, with no assistance from me. I just can't understand - seems to be no rhyme or reason to it all. Little monkey.
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#11 ~ela~

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Posted 22 July 2011 - 02:05 PM

What time is he waking to start his day in the morning?

I will suggest the opposite - an early morning tea and lunch, wear him out in the mornings, have lunch around 11.30, then in bed around 12. I was doing this with Ethan around 2yrs because he was feral by 1pm. Now at 2.5yrs he will go to sleep (now takes himself off to bed!) from 1pm and sleep for an hour. At Daycare on a Thursday he has lunch at 11.15-30 and he is always the first asleep at 11.30-12!

I have two early risers here, so do everything in the mornings (generally), so I know I can be home for/after lunch for either/both of them to sleep, and gives me a small amount of time to get things ready and dinner organised for that night.

I would hate to have to spend all afternoon everyday dealing with a cranky overtired child, must be hard. Consider trying the early lunch and early sleep, try and persevere for around 5 days to give him a chance to adjust, and in the mornings do swimming/outside play/park trips/play centre visits, whatever you think of to exhaust him!

#12 LoveSweetpea

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Posted 22 July 2011 - 02:11 PM

Hmmm I didn't really think to put him to bed EARLIER. Maybe he is getting a bit overtired by 1 and that's his issue? Can try that, no harm in it - because believe me, I DO hate the afternoons he's acting up with his sleep!!

He wakes up anywhere between 7:30 and 8 though, so maybe he wouldn't be tired enough by 12-ish? Who knows!! Not really keen to wake him up earlier than that though...selfish I know but I like my little sleep in!! Although I guess if it's the difference between what's been happening the last month or so and having a little one who just goes straight of to sleep again I could try waking him at 7 every day...
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#13 *Simone*

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Posted 22 July 2011 - 02:31 PM

QUOTE(LoveSweetpea @ Jul 22 2011, 02:11 PM) View Post

Hmmm I didn't really think to put him to bed EARLIER. He wakes up anywhere between 7:30 and 8 though, so maybe he wouldn't be tired enough by 12-ish?


I was also going to ask what time he wakes up in the morning. If that's the time I would try waking him up at 7am, and sticking with a naptime somewhere between 12:30 and 1:30.
My son at almost 20 months, has a 7am to 7pm day and goes down pretty tiredly at 12:45 for a sleep each day and does at least 2 hours in bed.
I guess it is possible he could outgrow the sleep, but if he is that tired in the afternoon it doesn't sound like it.

I also second the idea of keeping the mornings for activites and the afternoons for quiet time where possible.

#14 loni

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Posted 22 July 2011 - 02:47 PM

This might just be a phase he is going through.....Cameron recently went through a stage of playing in his cot for 2-3 hours instead of sleeping but eventually went back to his normal routine. Even now, he has days when he doesn't fall asleep but I figure as long as he is having a rest period, that's good enough as he copes well without a nap. I didn't change any part of his routine (e.g. waking him earlier, putting him to bed earlier/later etc).
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#15 LoveSweetpea

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Posted 23 July 2011 - 03:52 PM

I'm thinking I'm going to run with the whole "it's a phase" thing and hopefully he'll go back to normal soon.

He went to sleep by himself today again so that's 2 days in a row and was asleep withing probably 15-20 minutes. We didn't have a huge morning either, so it's not like he was tired out and so went to sleep. Who knows what's going on. Maybe its a separation thing he's going through? Wouldn't really think so though as surely he'd then have the same issues at night time and there is no problem there (touch wood!)

I don't really want to change his waking times etc as he sleeps for 12 hours over night, pretty much 7:30 till 7:30 which really works for us as a family (ie eating dinner together every night etc).

I'm trying to tell myself too that even though it is frustrating and annoying (and I really hope he doesn't do this when I have the new baby wacko.gif ) before too long I'll barely be able to get a kiss out of him so maybe I should just enjoy that he needs me now. Trying to tell myself that anyway... tongue.gif
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