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When do you talk about your children


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#16 squidge

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Posted 03 July 2011 - 09:54 PM

Yay that's great that it's now out in the open biggrin.gif I hope things progress well from here biggrin.gif

#17 {Manda}

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Posted 04 July 2011 - 09:14 AM

Someone having children is a 'deal breaker' for me, so I would be PISSED if they waited until I went on a date with them to tell me.

This doesn't make me a bad person, it's just a decision that I've made for myself. If I'm not prepared to give up things to raise a child of my own, then why on earth would I give them up to raise somebody else's child???

Children, smoking, excessive drinking, are all things that should be disclosed on the get-go, because they are deal breakers for a LOT of people.

#18 HoneyBunch

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Posted 04 July 2011 - 08:10 PM

QUOTE({Manda} @ Jul 4 2011, 09:14 AM) View Post

Someone having children is a 'deal breaker' for me, so I would be PISSED if they waited until I went on a date with them to tell me.

This doesn't make me a bad person, it's just a decision that I've made for myself. If I'm not prepared to give up things to raise a child of my own, then why on earth would I give them up to raise somebody else's child???

Children, smoking, excessive drinking, are all things that should be disclosed on the get-go, because they are deal breakers for a LOT of people.


Having a child used to be a deal breaker for me too, and I'm in a very happy relationship with a man with a 7yr old son. I honestly couldn't be happy, i thouhght i wouldn't want to raise someone else's child either, but it's different when you're in love with the person, and in turn the little person wub.gif

Once you get to a certain age you need to be open minded because so many people have children young, and so many marriages are now ending in divorce, there are lots and lots of eligible single parents out there.

LA how are things going with your man?


The member formerly known as Snerlette... Moving on to bigger and better things!

#19 loveActually

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Posted 04 July 2011 - 09:11 PM

QUOTE(HoneyBunch @ Jul 4 2011, 08:10 PM) View Post

Having a child used to be a deal breaker for me too, and I'm in a very happy relationship with a man with a 7yr old son. I honestly couldn't be happy, i thouhght i wouldn't want to raise someone else's child either, but it's different when you're in love with the person, and in turn the little person wub.gif

Once you get to a certain age you need to be open minded because so many people have children young, and so many marriages are now ending in divorce, there are lots and lots of eligible single parents out there.

LA how are things going with your man?


HI Girls,

Well things were going along well... he knew i had lil man all weekend and that is why I wasnt able to go out with him this weekend. Anyways over the weekend he said to catch up if I had the time and if I wanted to... So I agreed and took my son with me to meet him for icecream. When I met up with him he was still with his friend (was waiting for me to get there coz i was busy so he said he would chill out with his friend till i got there) who was a woman. THen he said to go for a drive with them to drop her off..>!?!? I said no cz my son needs his child seat and to just go alone. He felt really bad but left. I was really confused and shocked. Why would he do this? ANyway this time it didnt feel the same was weird... AND K was with us so all my focus was on him.

End of the night I was feeling awkard... I msged him saying sorry I was weird I was thrown off by that girl. He wrote how he is sorry and its his fault but she is a good friend who knows all abut me. He said And sorry if I was also acting weird I wasnt expecting to meet K tonight!!! ohmy.gif I didnt think much of it I thought he knew. Feel bad now. Second date was prob too soon and the whole night I was only focussing on K cooz he in his terrible 2 stages lol.

Oh dear... anyway I think I will concentrate on just getting to know him and not when I have K in my care... I am seeing him again this weekend to get back to the chemistry we first felt (i hope)

Just a bit thrwn off...ive seen him 3 times now, 2 of which he has been with girls who are his friends. I guess Im not so use to a man having female friends like that...hmmm

#20 29 Pearls

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Posted 12 July 2011 - 01:21 PM

It just clicked with me who you are. Dont be put off by a man who has friends as women. Most of my DH's best mates are women, thankfully I've known him and his friends since I was 12 so I have no questions about their friendships. Try to look at it this way, if he has women friends then it generally means that he treats women with respect and kindness. No woman in their right mind would hang around a male friend if they treated them like shit.

I know you have your doubts about this one and it's very wise to not jump in head first but in saying that you've gone through a difficult time with your ex and you now how insight into how things change and the warning signs to look out for.

FWIW I think you should take it slow with any relationship. You've not long seperated from your ex and you need to rediscover who you are and become a confident, self assured woman before jumping into another relationship. I would also keep K out of your relationship with this man for now. It's far too soon for him to be experiencing his mum with another man and TBH knowing your back ground I would be petrified of your ex finding out and becoming resentful and vengeful. Dont forget that he saw you as his possession and he will not like you being with another man.




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