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14m old - no day sleep at all

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#1 Bel_000



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Posted 27 June 2011 - 01:30 PM

Hello there

Im not even sure why Im posting here, probably to vent my frustration and hope that perhaps someone has gone through something similar!

My 14m old has never been a great day sleeper. Catnaps until about 10 mths when we finally seemed to break in to some sort of habit and cruised along on one two hour sleep for a couple of months which was bliss. Then of course, it changed.. mad.gif

Lately I have no idea what it is, it's like he is just not tired. I used to put him down at 1030am (he sleeps anywhere from 630-7pm til about 630-7am with no wakes at all) and that was great. Then all of a sudden he wasn't tired then so I pushed it out til 11,1130, 12. He used to just roll over and go to sleep. The last couple of weeks he is just NOT SLEEPING. Or faffing around for about 1.5h before he does, by this time its about 4pm and the whole afternoon is wasted.

yesterday he fell asleep in the car at 1130, the day before it was 2pm. Today I just got him up at 130 after being in there for 1.5 hours without sleeping. He would happily just not sleep at all. I on the other hand, would go completely insane laugh.gif

I just don't know what to do with him. Keep him up til 2pm when Im sure he HAS to be tired and try then? Waste the whole afternoon chasing the sleep that never comes? Be satisfied with 1 hour of 'quiet time' in the cot?

Surely he's not dropping this sleep already?

#2 **** Sarah and Adam ****

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Posted 27 June 2011 - 02:47 PM

Personally I would not LET him drop it. My experience is that they need it, even up at 4 there are days when our 4 y.o will nod off in the car (mind you thats maybe once a month nowdays). But for a long time he NEEDED them. My 16 month old has 1 day sleep and I honestly don't know what I would do without it. I guess it depends on what you are prepared to do from here.
Maybe going back to basics and looking for his tired signs, maybe 1pm is more realistic for him and he might only need an hour of sleep/quiet time in his cot given he gets a solid 12 hours at night. Or maybe he is getting tired at 11ish but your missing the cues and then he gets a second wind?
I'm not sure WHAT would be the problem but it is very useful to get in the habit of doing a consistent nap time, maybe work out what works for you and your activities and work it in with that. i.e. if out most mornings put him down at 1ish and leave him until 2.30 regardless of whether he sleeps or not (well obviously if he sleeps allow him to wake up), quiet time is still beneficial and 'developementally' it is important for him to have that minimal stimulation and 'boredom' that comes with the quiet time.
if it were me I would ensure I put him down at the same time everyday and occasionally go for a walk or something at that time to encourage him to nod off and hopefully a habit will form.

#3 scasey77


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Posted 27 June 2011 - 03:17 PM

I agree with Heather to persevere as they really do need their sleep.

Both of my kids do 11-12 hours overnight and both were on a 1pm sleep by that age. It might be that he needs just that bit more awake time to be tired enough to go to sleep.

Cate (now 3.5) has looked like giving up her day sleep 3 or 4 times since about the age of 26 months but I just continued to put her into bed and she has always gone back to having a sleep within a few weeks. Of course I have moved her sleep time out a bit as time has gone on but never gone past 2pm because it makes her sleep too late in the day. The most recent bout I let her take a book to bed to read and now after about 4 weeks she is back to sleeping again.

SO after all that babble - I would maybe try a 1pm sleep for a week and see how you go.

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#4 Bel_000



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Posted 27 June 2011 - 05:49 PM

Thanks for your replies. I really appreciate it. He's my first baby so it's so hard to know what's going on!

I guess my problem was that he just doesn't seem tired - whether it be 11am or 2pm! When he was on a 1030 sleep I couldn't miss that window period or he just wouldn't go to sleep easily (which was only a few weeks ago) so I guess I've been floundering trying to find my new 1030 :-D

1pm seems reasonable and fits in with us as we usually go out and do things in the morning. I like the idea of 1-230 sleep or no sleep.

Today he did from 2.45-3.15pm after about 3 hours of trying.

He's not walking yet, so Im clinging to the fact that once he starts running around he'll tire himself out and settle down in to some sort of routine. It's not even the length of sleep that bothers me.. its the unpredicability of the times! I guess I should be grateful he's a good night sleeper.

Thanks again for your responses.

#5 Thelma


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Posted 27 June 2011 - 07:22 PM

QUOTE(Bel_000 @ Jun 27 2011, 05:49 PM) View Post

I guess my problem was that he just doesn't seem tired - whether it be 11am or 2pm!

My DD rarely appears tired when I put her to sleep. We just have a routine and she gets put into bed at pretty much the same time every day. If she's tired earlier than I put her down, but those times are rare. She NEEDS to have a sleep every day, especially at this age. I don't wait for her cues, she just gets put into bed. We have the same routine every day. She eats her lunch, gets cleaned up, change her nappy and then into bed.

#6 Cole29*



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Posted 27 June 2011 - 08:12 PM

I too agree with perservering, sorry i know thats not much help but at 14 months he really would need it. Ben often doesnt appear tired before his arvo sleep, but i look at the time and put him to bed anyway. He still has 2 day sleeps at 16 months so I just couldnt imagine no day sleep at all. I hope you find a new nap time that works for both of you.
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#7 *Simone*



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Posted 27 June 2011 - 08:15 PM

Like scasey I would also suggest a later nap time of 1pm. My son moved quite quickly from 11am nap time to a 1pm one quite quickly around the same age.

To try and get this happening stick to a time and routine for the nap for a few weeks and hopefully a habit should form.

At 18 months he is still on a 1pm nap time for 2 hours if that helps.

#8 flowerrose


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Posted 27 June 2011 - 08:54 PM

Sophie started dropping her day naps at around 14 months and I gave up the battle at 19 months. It's just the way she is. I would persevere for a while as Soph would dip in and out of needing a nap but don't stress out about it so much that you're wasting half the day trying to get DS down.

A lot of people will tell you that they wouldn't accept a child dropping their nap that young and that they need it but unless you've been there with your own kid you don't know what they will and won't do.

Does he sleep OK at night? Sophie did 13-14.5 hours straight, which is more sleep than a lot of day nappers get in total so what can you do?

#9 kibo


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Posted 27 June 2011 - 09:35 PM

Like Flowerrose my DD dropped her day nap at about 13-14 months. I tried to fight it, but she was never a great day sleeper & always slept less than other kids her age. Not that she wouldn't sleep, just she needed less naps IYKWIM.

The only way I could get her to drop off after about 13 months was to either go for a really long walk in the buggy, or to drive for ages until she fell asleep. It just wasn't worth it & she wasn't grumpy without the nap, just needed a earlier bedtime.

We just had quiet time on the couch together, or she watched a special dvd, just so I could get a bit of a break.

It's worth trying a later naptime though if you think you can work thru it. I was so jealous of people with kids who slept smile.gif
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