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Engagement party guest list help

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#1 muffin83



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Posted 05 March 2011 - 04:58 PM

Hi everyone, this is a tricky one!

I've always thought only people who are coming to the wedding were invited to the engagement party. But our families say we should have a large 'anyone can come' engagement party because we are only having a small 50 person wedding.

What's your thoughts on this?

I like the idea of celebrating with the extended family and friends who we can't afford to have at the wedding, but I don't want to hurt feelings when they aren't invited to the 'main wedding event'.

Our thought was to make it clear on the invites to the e-party that "we aren't sure how big our wedding will be but we want you to be there to celebrate with us at a casual get together..." eh try to get that in a neat sentence!

Any help on this one will be great!

#2 Daybreak


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Posted 05 March 2011 - 06:49 PM

Traditionally, I believe it's poor etiquette but it seems to be pretty common these days. Most people understand because they know how expensive weddings are, but that depends on your family and friends.
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#3 ♥ Emsie ♥

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Posted 05 March 2011 - 07:14 PM

friends of mine are doing this exact thing... but they are having a small destination wedding and are only inviting 40 people.

a text message was sent out saying "because we are getting married interstate we will be having a low key, small wedding, however we would still like to share this special occasion with you so please keep this date free as invitations will be coming shortly for our engagement party, which we hope you will be able to attend" or something like that.

I thought its a really good idea!
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#4 AK2


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Posted 06 March 2011 - 04:07 PM

Hmmm...it's a delicate thing to be handled. I know that just because I receive an engagement invitation doesn't automatically get me a wedding invite, but I know that some people just wouldn't get that.

How strong is your family grapevine? Could you avoid putting any wording on the invitation but spread the word around enough about it being a big party because you'll be having a small wedding? This would work in my family of gossipers tongue.gif , but might not work in some others.

#5 Carmel



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Posted 07 March 2011 - 02:17 PM

I would send invites out as normal. but then in your thanks for coming speech you can tell everyone that you are cherished that they could all share this day with you and you will be remembring this day on your wedding day which will be a small intimate wedding
Will you allow them to come to teh church, you could throw in that you are having a small rceltipon but they are all welcome to share ceremony

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