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When work won't give you leave


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#1 baloo

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 05:15 PM

So I'll explain my situation first then ask my questions.
I've just graduated from uni as a student nurse and start my new job as a registered nurse on 2nd August. As soon as I found out which ward I had been allocated to I contacted the ward nurse manager straight away. I explained that I was getting married at the end of October and would need 4 weeks off as we're going to France for our honeymoon. I explained that it was not in school holidays and would obviously take some of that time unpaid. She said she would get back to me. She left a message on my mobile today saying that they would only give me 2 weeks leave and to call her back. I don't want to call her back!
I have no idea what to do. I feel like I did everything right. It's hard to ask leave from someone who you haven't met before. I contacted her as soon as I could. I was polite. I explained my situation. I made sure she knew that it was school holidays (when mums want leave). I made sure she knew that I knew it would be unpaid.
I don't know what to do now.
How do you tell your employer that you ARE taking the leave. As it's my first job as a registered nurse I don't want to upset the boss. I've already booked the plane flights and don't want to shorten our honeymoon - it's our honeymoon - once in a life time.
Any ideas?
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#2 -Megs-

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 05:51 PM

There really isn't a lot you can do. They're being generous giving you 2 weeks when you will have been working for them for 3 months at most. Perhaps try explaining that your flights are already booked but I'd be fairly hesitant to push the issue too much as you will have to work with these people for some time. It's really something you should have brought up during the interview process.

#3 baloo

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 05:55 PM

QUOTE(-Megs- @ Jun 30 2010, 03:51 PM) View Post

There really isn't a lot you can do. They're being generous giving you 2 weeks when you will have been working for them for 3 months at most. Perhaps try explaining that your flights are already booked but I'd be fairly hesitant to push the issue too much as you will have to work with these people for some time. It's really something you should have brought up during the interview process.


I would have but I wasn't even engaged then. They do the interview process 1 year in advance!!!!!!!! As soon as I had dates I contacted my contact person and they said I couldn't apply for leave until I had my ward allocated but it shouldn't be a problem. As soon as I had my ward allocated I contacted them. Some years they don't even allocate wards until 2 weeks before they're due to start.
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#4 nephthys

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 05:57 PM

While you did the right thing, I don't think there is much you can do. As an employer, I can see their point of view and while it's not fair, that's the conditions you agreed to when you accepted the job.

You have several options:

- Quit and find a job after the honeymoon.
- Approach them again and risk causing stress in your new relationship.
or in your shoes, I would
- Get a refund on the trip to France (or get flight credits) and take a short honeymoon. A honeymoon can be anywhere; you're celebrating your love for each other, it doesn't have to be a huge trip. Then, plan a big trip in a year's time when you're eligible to take it and you're more established and have built up a reputation. France will always be there. Because you're just starting out, it would be a good idea to live by your new employers rules. (My hubby and I did this - an el-cheapo honeymoon around NZ and then two years later we went to Asia for three weeks.) If you take a short honeymoon and really live it up to compensate, like to a boutique hotel along the Great Ocean Road or something. I know I was so exhausted from my wedding that I wished I'd just stopped after it instead of doing the eight days around NZ so it might work out okay still.

Anyway, that's just my thoughts although it's probably not what you want to hear!
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#5 ~AnA~

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 06:53 PM

I agree with the ladies above. However, take the time to get an explanation from your ward manager as to why 2 weeks was provided (but why not 4), and explain your situation (ie that you did everything you could to give notice of your honeymoon) and see where that takes you. I don't think you can do anything about your ward manager giving you 2 weeks at the end of the day.

Nephthys provides a good suggestion. We too took a shorter holiday to Thailand for 10 days (DH only had 2 weeks off) and had a wonderful time. A year and a half later, we took 4 weeks off and went to Europe - we had a trip of a lifetime and enjoyed ourselves immensely (also had a bit more money as the wedding was way behind us)..

Best of luck with your plans.


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#6 ..::*Miss_Jen*::..

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 07:09 PM

Sadly I have to agree with the other girls. I have had some issues getting time off for my honeymoon also... although my employer will allow me to take the 3 weeks off that I want, he won't let me take it off unpaid. I have to use all the leave I have accumulated for next year and use that, leaving me with no leave for next year if I need it, only then will they let me take it unpaid. Unfortunately this is the new rule our compant bosses have brought in and we can't do anything about it. I don't want to use next years holidays already, incase something happens next year and I need to take time off and can't afford to take it unpaid, but it's the only choice I have.. otherwise I won't be able to take the leave I need for my honeymoon.

If your boss will only give you 2 weeks off then I'm not sure there isn't anything you can do. 2 weeks is still a pretty good honeymoon, and then maybe you can take a couple of weeks or longer off at a later stage. I think no matter how long or short your honeymoon is, it will still be an amazing, romantic, special time!

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#7 baloo

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 07:39 PM

Thank you everyone for your thoughts. I'm so mad at myself for getting into this position to begin with. I think perhaps I got over excited with the thoughts of Paris that I was unrealistic. I'll be talking with FH when he gets home from work. We'll work something out.
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#8 Thelma

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 08:15 PM

QUOTE(nephthys @ Jun 30 2010, 05:57 PM) View Post

I know I was so exhausted from my wedding that I wished I'd just stopped after it


I agree. We just had a chill out holiday at Port Douglas and I'm so glad. DH and I were so run down we both came down with a bad cold and we just spent time wandering along the beach and watching DVDs and eating nice food. I don't think I could have handled a full on sightseeing holiday


#9 jessmay

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 08:44 PM

It depends on how much you value your job, job security and chances of finding more work in the industry.

I applied for 3.5 weeks leave for 5 months time not long after I'd come back from 4 weeks holiday as we'd decided to visit overseas family at the last minute. I also asked for half of it unpaid as I didn't have that much leave. HOWEVER I work in an industry where I could easily get a job elsewhere and don't particularly like my boss/management so it was more if a "well if they say no it's a good excuse to quit" sort of thing. I think that's the only time you could really push for more holidays as otherwise it really could ruin things!

On a positive not though one of the best things about holidays is looking forward to and planning them! So if you do just take the 2 weeks, regardless of where you go you can plan to take the other 2 weeks or more in the next year or two and have fun planning the trip (when you don't already have the wedding and married life to look forward to as well! Space out the excitement a bit!)
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#10 pinkbutterfly

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 09:21 PM

I'd ring and clarify. Maybe she meant you would get 2 weeks paid, and you will have to take the rest unpaid.
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#11 nephthys

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 09:31 PM

QUOTE(baloo @ Jun 30 2010, 07:39 PM) View Post

Thank you everyone for your thoughts. I'm so mad at myself for getting into this position to begin with. I think perhaps I got over excited with the thoughts of Paris that I was unrealistic. I'll be talking with FH when he gets home from work. We'll work something out.

I can understand why you're disappointed but not why you're mad at yourself? I get so excited about future holidays that I'd have a good cry if something like this happened to spoil it. These are the cards you've been dealt so look at some great things you can do in a lesser time.

When you say two weeks for the honeymoon, does this mean you won't take time off before the wedding or will you work right up to it? If you need time off for the wedding, that will reduce the time even more.
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#12 lizzums

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 09:37 PM

QUOTE(pinkbutterfly @ Jun 30 2010, 09:21 PM) View Post

I'd ring and clarify. Maybe she meant you would get 2 weeks paid, and you will have to take the rest unpaid.

Thats what I was thinking as well.
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#13 claire_p

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 09:47 PM

QUOTE(pinkbutterfly @ Jun 30 2010, 09:21 PM) View Post

I'd ring and clarify. Maybe she meant you would get 2 weeks paid, and you will have to take the rest unpaid.

This was my first thought too.
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#14 toska

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Posted 01 July 2010 - 10:05 AM

First thing I would do is call and clarify the situation, you may be stressing for nothing smile.gif

I'm going to go against the grain here.
For events such as your honeymoon I think it is unreasonable for an employer to expect you to shorten or cancel it. I can completely understand their point of view and if I were an employer I would most likely have a simliar policy. However I'm not and I don't.

My sister just came to visit and I hadn't seen her in 2.5 years. If I was told that I could not have my two weeks leave I would have quit my job right then and there. Rash? Perhaps, but for me I work to live not the other way around. Work already takes so much of our time, they can't have the "good bits" too.

Good luck!

#15 baloo

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Posted 01 July 2010 - 03:52 PM

Our decision:
To take the 2 weeks given and change our flights and have a shorter honeymoon - though still in France.
Still sucks but I really don't want to delay or quit my grad program and really don't want to push the issue as they will be my boss and I want them to like me.
Thank you for all your input.
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