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Anxiety, hopelessness and being absolutely petrified


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#16 hearts_in_asia

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Posted 14 November 2009 - 07:29 PM

I can't relate to the LTTTC part, but I can 100% relate to the anxiety part.

My main advice is to just keep talking, talking, talking it out smile.gif

For me, things haven't really gotten any easier. I find as we progress I just find something new to worry about! For example, I felt so relieved at getting to 24 weeks at last, and then I had a massive stress attack over something minor and it gave me a reality check that, basically, I'm just going to keep on worrying as it's just a part of my personality. I have a hard time sometimes believing that there is still a real, live baby in there!

In my case, coping is a combination of talking to my gorgeous husband who is never slow with a hug, the medication I am on, and writing in my journal almost everyday. I write down everything, the good bits and the bad bits and when I look back I can see how I go up in one week and back down the next. It's hard work!

But, keep talking in a way which makes you feel safe to say everything, whether this is to a professional, your OH, friends, online, diary, whatever smile.gif No one will dismiss your worries, they are normal and justified.

Hang in there, you'll be OK smile.gif
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#17 KellM

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Posted 15 November 2009 - 12:07 PM

Thanks girls. I am going to start writing things down - I bought a journal to write things down and feel silly writing in it but I am going to try. I am also going to take the suggestion of buying one little thing for each milestone - start with a healthy heartbeat for our 7 week scan.

I tried to talk to my Mum about it yesterday and broke down in tears and all I got was a you can't stress it will damage the baby. I won't be talking to her about things anymore - we aren't really overly close - never have been.

Taking each day as it comes is working right now. DH gets home on Tuesday and I will be glad when he does I won't feel so alone.

I am going to ask for another blood test again this week just to put my mind at ease.

Thanks girls - I am glad I am not the only one going through things like this

xox KAAM
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#18 Renee`

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Posted 15 November 2009 - 03:07 PM

I am so glad DH is so close to being home, it will hopefully ease things a lil for you! YOU know my PM box is ALWAYS open for you!
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#19 hearts_in_asia

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Posted 15 November 2009 - 03:43 PM

QUOTE(KAAAM @ Nov 15 2009, 01:07 PM) View Post


I tried to talk to my Mum about it yesterday and broke down in tears and all I got was a you can't stress it will damage the baby. I won't be talking to her about things anymore - we aren't really overly close - never have been.


Oh, I'm sorry your mum was not supportive sad.gif Stressing will not damage your baby. My GP did tell me that mothers with high anxiety can have babies which move less, but that's not the same as damaging them! (talk about catch-22! you worry, so baby stays still, so you worry that the baby isn't moving! Oh, I've been there! blink.gif)

I'm glad your DH is home soon, he should be good support for you (he doesn't have to 'understand', but just be there as a sounding post or someone to lean on).

With your journal, I find it helpful to not force myself to write in it or write 'properly', occasionally I'll write pages but most of it is just brief sentences and notes. I keep it in my handbag and just whip it out whenever I think of something smile.gif
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#20 atua

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Posted 15 November 2009 - 04:41 PM

oh hun sad.gif

to do any type of damage to bubs you have to have cortisol levels off the chart and i don't think the placenta even kicks in til 10w which is how it passes to them.

i can only echo the other wise ones - find someone you feel comfortable talking with and TALK TALK TALK, remove the negative/non helpful ppl from your life and only have supportive positive ppl around you that truly listen and don't do the 'yeah uh huh no you don't say' kind of listening.

i hear you so much on the anxiety part - that's part of the reason i'm in counselling now, honestly the best thing i have ever done was finding her - no judgement, completely impartial, just listens.

otherwise you're already doing everything i would have suggested.
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