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Questions Regarding Newborns


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#1 brightspark

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 12:20 PM

Hi ladies

i asked these questions of some my close girlfriends and got some really great answers and helpful hints, so I thought that I would post the questions here too ... apologies if they have been asked previously.

1. What was the best piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
2. What was the least most useful piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
3. What was the one thing you wish someone had told you?
4. What was the most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?
5. What was the least most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?



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#2 ClaireBell

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 12:29 PM

1. What was the best piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?

They don't always need to be fed when they cry.

2. What was the least most useful piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?

That picking her up whenever she cries or carrying her around in a sling would lead to a spoilt child dry.gif

3. What was the one thing you wish someone had told you?

Newborns should only be awake for 90min at a time, including feeding, bathing, changing.

I read my sleep/feed chart that I kept in hospital and the first few weeks at home. Day 5 for Amelia shows - awake at 7.30am, feed, changed, asleep again at 11am - YIKES!!!!

4. What was the most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?

Cooked meals, did the washing and changed the bed sheets after numerous boobie leakages!!

5. What was the least most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?

Offered unwanted suggestions 'she has wind, she is hungry' and subtle criticisms 'I'm surprised she isn't wearing a singlet, maybe she is cold that is why she is crying' which made me feel like a dill! And taking Amelia off me to comfort her when she was crying instead of leaving me to work things out myself.

Oh and coming to stay for a week two days after we got home from hospital!!
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#3 pinkbutterfly

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 12:34 PM

1. What was the best piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
If they are upset it will be one of only 4 things.

1. Nappy.
2. Tired.
3. Hungry.
4. Wind


2. What was the least most useful piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
I think all advice is useful. It might not work for you but sometimes its worth a try. It's only not useful when it's delivered in way that is like "this worked for me so it will definately work for you and there is no other way."

3. What was the one thing you wish someone had told you?
Tough one. I figured it all out eventually. I found going to a new mothers group in those first few months to be absolutely invaluable.

4. What was the most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?

My mum came and did all the cooking cleaning washing etc.

5. What was the least most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?


My mum nagged me the whole time she was here.

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#4 Starbuck

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 12:54 PM

1. What was the best piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
Pick one source of information you are comfortable with (esp re BF) and ignore everything else.

2. What was the least most useful piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
Put her down awake. That works for some babies but not screamy overtired reflux babies. Made me feel like crap for weeks because I thought there was something wrong with us.

3. What was the one thing you wish someone had told you?
Same as Claire - feed, change, straight back to sleep, they don't need any "awake" time. Also to drink more water, I got really badly constipated!

4. What was the most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?
We were sent a fruit basket which came in SO handy. Mum did heaps in those early weeks too.

5. What was the least most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?
Implying that we had left the hospital too soon and that she was crying all the time because of it. She was crying all the time there too!


#5 Renee`

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 01:00 PM

1. What was the best piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
How to look for wind

2. What was the least most useful piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
That I was going to be making a rod for my own back, by refusing to let my daughter cry herself to sleep. So I should just leave her in her bed to cry it out.

3. What was the one thing you wish someone had told you?
That there was a thing called nipple shields that could of enabled me to feed.

4. What was the most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?

Watch Kaele for a few hours every now and again so I could sleep.

5. What was the least most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?

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#6 * MsSassy *

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 01:09 PM

I like these. Great thread smile.gif

#7 Kell

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 01:21 PM

1. What was the best piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
There is no "right" way to do anything, do what works.

2. What was the least most useful piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
Similar to others, that not leaving him to cry would create a rod for my own back, ditto letting him feed to sleep etc. Never did cause a problem!

3. What was the one thing you wish someone had told you?
Nothing with Finn was a surprise as such, just the degree of it was - e.g. being THAT tired, THAT intense etc. (THAT good too!)

4. What was the most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?
Cooking/Cleaning and letting me sleep as much as possible!

5. What was the least most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?
MIL staying for 2 weeks from the day we got home from hospital. Have made it DAMN clear that will NOT be happening again this time!!!

"Okay Mum, so if we can't find it at THIS place... Screw it!! Right?!"
"You use twitter Mama, so that must make youuuu... a twit?" Finn, 5
"Show Dadda your dance Mama! I like it when people laugh at you!" Finn, 5
J: Carrying a baby is the most special thing you can do! Finn:"Yeah... Except for having a sausage sizzle at my school!"


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#8 woody

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 01:34 PM

Great thread...

1. What was the best piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
All the different positions to burp and settle bubs and do what you think is right for you and your baby..

2. What was the least most useful piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
Start feeding her solids at 6 weeks as she was underweight..

3. What was the one thing you wish someone had told you?
That formula is a fine alternative if your baby isn't getting enough milk from bb's and losing weight rapidly.. Instead of me persisting and trying to feed her every 15mins with massively cracked nipples and major depression looming in.

4. What was the most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?
Cook and housework.

5. What was the least most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital
Visit all hours of the day/night, including staying 12hours or so.
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#9 Oldie

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 01:37 PM

1. What was the best piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?

Go with what works best for you.
A face washer across the chest when in the bath makes a baby feel secure and enjoy the bath more.

2. What was the least most useful piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?

Don't time your feeds, a baby will take itself off the breast when it has had enough. dry.gif Not my baby. Some of our early feeds went for well over an hour and Gemma would still cry when taken off the breast, she just liked to comfort suck. After two weeks of this we bought a dummy and it saved my sanity.

If it hurts you aren't doing it right regarding breast feeding. Even if you are doing everything right attatchment wise, breast feeding can still hurt like hell.

3. What was the one thing you wish someone had told you?

That some babies like to comfort suck.

4. What was the most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?

Bringing a meal over after us canceling dinner several times on them.

5. What was the least most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?

When distressed insist that she had wind because she was blue around the mouth. No, she is distressed because we have a house full of *^%$ing people who are overstimulating her. mad.gif
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#10 beth

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 02:05 PM

1. What was the best piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
Babies cry for a reason, try feeding, nappy, burping and just cuddles smile.gif And follow your instincts



2. What was the least most useful piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
Instantly reacting to my son crying will 'teach him bad ideas' blink.gif And co-sleeping and baby wearing is making a 'rod for my own back' - bah humbug to 'em



3. What was the one thing you wish someone had told you?
That no one can do it all. I wanted to be perfect at everything, so I busted my behind to keep the house clean when all I really wanted to do was sleep. The housework will still be there after a cuddle/nap with your baby, but they will be too big very soon

4. What was the most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?
This was actually in the hospital, but my sil helped me brush my hair and wash my face cos I couldn't get out of bed and had been up for 40 hours and looked and felt terrible. I still get emotional thinking about her being so careful with me wub.gif


5. What was the least most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?
On the night we came home my Mum came to stay with all of my little siblings (4 of them) in my tiny house, and brought dinner with her - just for them! So my husband had to run out and get us something to eat ....ON HIS BIRTHDAY!!!! Poor guy!
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#11 Lollies

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 02:10 PM

1. What was the best piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn? With breastfeeding & attachment, I had no idea if she was attaching correctly. The nurses at the hospital were all telling me it wasn't right & pulling her off & I had no idea what 'right' looked like or felt like. Then one little old lady midwife said "When she's attaching right, her little mouth will be like the lips on the 'Special K' box, not tiny & pursed" - at that point I finally got it.

2. What was the least most useful piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
Put her on formula, then she will sleep through.


3. What was the one thing you wish someone had told you?
I spend a lot of time in the first few weeks so stressed with an unhappy baby from late afternoon till late at night. I wish I knew earlier on that it is quite normal for new babies to have unsettled times everyday instead of thinking something was wrong.


4. What was the most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?
Just holding my baby when she was crying. Everybody thinks the mum will know what to do, sometimes a newborn is screaming & there is nothing mum can do if bubs if fed, burped, clean nappy etc, so someone else just taking over for a few minutes even when the baby is inconsolable is great. Let the tired mummy breath!


5. What was the least most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital? Many visitors everyday for the first week. All expecting morning tea/lunch/afternoon tea/ drink/snack... I was constantly in the kitchen serving & tidying up... I was very exhausted but wanted to be a good host, I wish they had visited at the hospital.
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#12 ClaireBell

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 03:34 PM

QUOTE(Oldie @ Jun 17 2008, 02:37 PM) View Post

Even if you are doing everything right attatchment wise, breast feeding can still hurt like hell.


I can say now BFing doesn't hurt, maybe the books were all written months later rolleyes.gif but yes at first, no matter how good attachment was, it still hurt like hell - noone ever told me that!!
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Hannah - 06/08/10


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#13 Framboise

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 03:34 PM

1. What was the best piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
Two pieces really:
- get BF right from the start and everything else will follow. The most important thing is the latch - the Special K lips!! I was obsessed with getting the latch right and never had any pain or cracked nipples. It has always been fine.
- babies need sleep - a newborn should be put back to bed within 75-90 mins of getting up.
- if a baby gets overstimulated it'll be that much harder to settle. Harry has only gone into his baby gym this week.

2. What was the least most useful piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?
If you cuddle them to sleep they'll never learn to fall asleep themselves. My boy settles himself to sleep in about 1 minute flat these days - even if he is crying. And a few weeks ago I was cuddling him for at least 1 or 2 naps a day.


3. What was the one thing you wish someone had told you?
That there is NOTHING wrong with dummies. Some babies NEED to suck.

4. What was the most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?
They called before coming round.
And when my Mum was here once Harry was 6 weeks, she took him off me every morning after his first feed and let me sleep until his next feed. She took care of changing him, settling him and getting him up again. I got to sleep in until 10am for 2 weeks!

5. What was the least most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?
Bringing toddlers round to my house and then leaving a mess behind!!
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#14 e*liz

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 05:15 PM

1. What was the best piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?

Never put housework before either your own rest, or spending time with baby.
Every baby is different - listen to advice and only follow what you really think suits you and your baby.
Try not to wish away the days because they grow up so fast.
Never feel bad about asking for help.

2. What was the least most useful piece of advice you received regarding looking after a newborn?

Don't 'spoil' her.

3. What was the one thing you wish someone had told you?

When they tell you that is normal for a newborn to cry A LOT they mean it - there is no reason to panic that you are doing something wrong if your baby cries for a few hours each day for no apparent reason. And that this will not last forever!

That 90 minutes of awake time is plenty.

4. What was the most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?

A neighhbour left a basket on our doorstep with a lovely home-cooked meal on the first night home. One of my friends came to visit in the second week and did some housework while I was feeding the baby.

5. What was the least most helpful thing a friend/family member did for you when you got home from hospital?

Telling me I had to restrict my diet drastically to stop her from crying.

Telling me that the breastfeeding and attachment problems I was having were because I wasn't willing to put up with pain.

Giving unsolicited advice but zero practical help.



#15 Kirstin2009

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Posted 17 June 2008 - 06:41 PM

this is a GREAT thread. its amazing how much bad advice is given and how rude family members/friends can be!!!!
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