If you have obsessive-compulsive disorder or OCD, you're overwhelmed by disturbing thoughts you can't control. These are called obsessions.
To get rid of these thoughts, you might do certain things over and over again, like check to see if the stove is turned off or wash your hands. These are called compulsions. If you don't do them, you feel that something bad will happen.

You know it doesn't make sense, but you can't change this unwanted way of acting or thinking.

About 1 in 50 Americans, as many as 5 million, have OCD at some point in their lives. OCD can happen to anyone. OCD usually starts in the teen or early adult years, but children can have it, too. OCD starts earlier in boys than in girls. In adults, men and women are affected in equal numbers. Sometimes OCD runs in families.


I suffer from OCD and have done now for just over 8 months. I cannot do some things now that i've continuously done for the last 2, 3, 5 10. Today - they cause me great stress & anxiety.

Tonight - i couldn't make a toasted sandwich without going through 4 pieces of cheese, half a loaf of bread and a tomato - because "somewhere along the line" they got "contaminated".... in my own kitchen.... with my own hands that i've washed so many times they are like sandpaper.

Yes - i know my thoughts are irrational, but on some days i believe them as much as i believe the sky is blue. I KNOW that i've made toasties in the past without getting sick - so why can't i believe it now? Why does it reduce me to tears to the point where i don't feel like i can eat anything for fear of where it's "been"?

I've had enough of this condition controlling my mind. I've had enough of the thoughts which won't go away no matter how much i tell them i want them too. I am tired of worrying my poor husband because he doesn't know what he can do to help me.

It's time to figure out once and for all how to beat this - i will NOT let it win....


Does anybody out there suffer from this awful unwanted condition?

Oh Dani. I'm so sorry.

Are you seeing anyone to get help for this? You've got so much life in you and so much living to do, it would be a shame if this controlled you, rather than you being able to control it.

Thx love....

Believe it or not i DID go and see a counsellor.... she told me i was just "hygienic" and not OCD....

Load of BULL - but at the time i believed it because i wanted to be "normal"....

Dani, do you find it is more to do with food?

It revolves COMPLETELY around food. I can handle germs and being dirty (to some extent ) but trying to eat something or prepare a meal is a nightmare. Before anything goes near my mouth or my fingers my hands need to be scrubbed clean.... The toastie i made tonight - i washed my hands 4 times.... to make 1 sandwhich....

Dani, sorry you suffer from this.

I too have OCD and it can be one of the most debilitating illnesses. I've suffered from this since I was about 11 or so. I have the variety that obsesses over numbers. It's very hard to describe but basically everything has to add up to 5. It started off with having to walk a certain number of steps, and progressed later at the age of 21 to counting words, letters and syllables when watching a movie or having a conversation with someone. It gets to the point where I don't follow the conversation because I'm too busy counting a word to take notice. Say for example there's a 3 letter word such as 'can' I have to spell it until it ends up on a 5 i.e. spell it 5 times makes 15 letters and I'm happy with that

It probably makes no sense but anyways. Additionally I have a number of associated uncontrollable tics and twitches which I find far more debilitating and embarrassing but they're related to the OCD. I have NO control over nodding my head or twitching my nose for example.

As well as that at home I MUST eat all meals with MY fork and my fork only. I will only drink out of MY glass/mug. etc etc.

I struggle with social situations because of the above, and find when I'm stressed it gets worse so it's a vicious cycle. I stress over the OCD, OCD gets worse. I suffer from depression, OCD gets worse, depression gets worse.

I waited until I was 25 to go to a doctor because I was so embarrassed and thought it was all in my head. I was medicated with zoloft which seemed to help somewhat, but meant I struggled with sleep. To help with the sleep I was given Avanza, but that meant I couldn't wake up in the morning to the kids so it was no good for me. I haven't been medicated since 2006, and currently things are pretty bad on the OCD front. After I lost my job in April, it escalated again.

I'd strongly suggest you go to a doctor and speak to them. I know it's embarrassing, and you'll probably feel silly, but they may be able to offer you something to help.

My inbox is always open if you need to talk

Take care,

Lanie
xxx

Lanie thanks for sharing your story.... I'm so sorry you suffer as well. It is such an awful awful condition. It's so hard to control.

Tas

ETA Thanks Bec. It's really good to know that i am not "the only one"....

Dani, I am sorry to hear you are struggling so.

At least you know, that there is a problem, and sound like you want some help to control it.
Definitely go see your doctor, and get a referral to the appropriate person if that is what it takes.
If the first doctor is not helpful, go to another one until you get the help you want.

If you needed to go to the doctor for a broken leg, you wouldn't just let them say it was fine and go home and continue on, so it should be the same principle here. You know you need their help, and you just need someone who can also acknowledge you need the help.

I hope I haven't sounded patronising, cause I certainly wasn't trying too. Hopefully, sounding supportive of you and your desire to control these obsessions and compulsions.

You are a strong lady, so I know you will do the right thing to take care of yourself.

Jen XXX

Dani I would highly recommend my chiropractor to assist you in this issue. My Chiro does NAET along with kinisiology and chinese medicine. A lot of what she does gets to the root of the emotion behind the issue. She works to ensure your body is operating as it should and gets to the root of the problem instead of treating if that makes sense.

Nayway, I'm sorry to hear that you've found this issues affecting your life in such a way that is not positive for you.

Dani, I can't offer advice, not having been through anything like that myself, but just wanted to offer you my support, and let you know that while you may have OCD, you are not strange, it is not your fault, and you are definitely not alone. xx

Thx everyone

We are off away for next 2 nights and then i'll be heading to my doctor next week to get things sorted

Hey Dani,

I'm sorry to hear what you are going through hun.

Thought i should share my experiences with OCD. My younger sister has always had various OCD habits. She was only diagnosed about 6 years ago.

My sister has done much research and spoken to her psychiatrist about all the different types or ways in that OCD presents. My sister has told me there is people who have a cleanliness/washing OCD, others with organizational OCD for example have to have things organized in rows or put in certain places. Then there is those who display hoarding habits, another is those who have to check things constantly and on the other end of the scale there are those who have obsessive thoughts usually about violent or sexual images.

My sisters OCD habits started as a child. It all started with hand washing, she would scrub or wash her hands all the time before eating till they were red.

Then it turned into a food thing. She wouldn't eat certain foods as she was obsessed they where unhealthy or not clean or cooked properly and that they would make her sick.

She then started compulsively locking and unlocking doors.

Unfortunately my parents never thought those things were anything to worry about.

As she has gotten older things got worse and in the last few years she got the obsessive thoughts type. It was very irrational but she was honestly so scared that she could hurt her family. She couldn't watch scary movies as they could put violent images into her head and she would just replay and replay them and she though about these things so much she was petrified she would one day do something like that. She of course is the most non violent person i know and would never hurt anyone. But she would work herself up into such a state that she would have a panic attack.

Over the years one OCD habit seems to die then another starts up. They have got as bad as being obsessed that she was going to die. She would tell me for days that she was sure "her time was up" it was most upsetting for her and me also. But i think that her depression was also contributing as it was causing her to be a bit morbid.

I'm sure that her uncontrolled OCD caused her much anxiety which eventually lead to her panic attacks.

She does have a psychiatrist who she sees for OCD and panic attacks and depression. Her psychiatrist has her on Zoloft which is good for depression but is meant to be one of the best around for OCD and panic attacks as well. Also the pychiatrist works on CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy with her) to try and break habits and help with depression.

So i hope i didn't scare you with all that but just wanted to say I think you are right to take it seriously and try and get on top of it. As it maybe could get out of control. I think because we didn't pick up on my sisters as a child hers spiraled out of control and defiantly lead to panic attacks. But hey i'm no doctor.

Just to let you know her OCD is quite well under control now. But each day is different with her, some high, some low as she does also have the depression and panic attacks.

Sorry for the essay of a post. Hope that was some help. My sister says she has a great forum for OCD too. PM me if you want the name of it.

Look after yourself , PM me any time,

Sarah xo

Buffy - thank you

Sarah please don't apologie for the essay - it re-enforced to me that i need to do something about this before it gets out of control. The tears were sitting in my throat reading about your sister, i am so pleased that she is on the mend now.

Dani I am so sorry you're dealing with this - its awful how bad it can affect your life.

My husband suffers mild OCD - his is mostly of the checking kind, that the stove is off, doors locked, etc.. More than once we have had to drive home to check the stove is off, despite me assuring him that it was. He is obsessed with security and must sleep closest to the door.

When we go somewhere for the first time, he checks the whole place out, remembers the lay out, locates all the exits etc.

His also fussy with food and hand washing etc.

It does affect your life and it doesnt matter how irrational the thoughts are, your feelings are real, and you need to acknowledge them and work through it.

I hope that you get more helpful advise this time when you see someone about it.

Thinking of you